The Queen of Optimism

January 22, 2010

Dear Dr. Neurologist,

I am submitting the MRI pictures for my brain, c-spine, t-spine, and l-spine, all taken in March 2009.  I have also included reports.

At this time, I have been experiencing an increase in my symptoms.  My impaired ability to dorsiflex my left foot typically fluctuates from mild to severe.  Lately, it is more often severe.  I am also presenting with other symptoms that have my Rheumatologist and Family Physician convinced the nature of the problems is neurological.  They are both also convinced that you are the doctor to figure out what has been baffling my other doctors.

I have a great career and am a happy mother and wife who wants a better quality of life.

Thank you for reviewing and I look forward to meeting with you.

Best regards,

Patient Q

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Could it be that this letter convinced Neurologist #4 to see me?  In less than three weeks, no less?  Did he find something in my MRI pictures that no one else caught?  Did I get drawn from the pile as a case for a Resident? (grrrrrowwwwll)

I discovered today that Dr. PCP never had a chance to speak with Dr. Neurologist. She never sent him any reports.  All he had to go by in selecting me was the above letter, two CDs of images, two MRI reports, and an EMG report.  His assistant told me it would not be enough to get me an appointment.  But I did.

Dr. PCP’s Medical Assistant feels divine intervention is at play.  I don’t think I can believe in that kind of thing no matter how strongly I want to.

I found myself at Dr. PCP’s office this morning because getting ready for work and driving with my arm in its current condition is not only painful but also challenging.  And, I feel, a safety risk.

My Sternocleidomastoid is still in spasm and now my trapezius muscle is as well.

“Let’s go back to basics” Dr. PCP said.  “It could be as simple as a radiculopathy”

So, off I went to the hospital with my x-ray prescription.  Several radiation exposures later, I was told I could leave.

Not so simple…simply puzzling.

No signs of radiculopathy or any lumbrosacral abnormalities.  I would have guessed I would have some visible issue with my left hip.  Nope.  I really wanted it to be simple.  I want to be just another person with sciatica or a pinched nerve.  Dammit!

It’s back to methyprednisolinone and valium for me.  Who knew? Valium is an effective muscle spasm reducer. I always thought it was just for anxiety so doubted its ability to help me until increasing my dosage.  Apparently, it only makes one loopy if they don’t actually need it.

For now, I seek relief.  I want to feel productive at work and feel productive for my appointment with Neuro #4.  Dr. PCP feels it’s not a good idea for her to join me for the first appointment but plans to call the doc to get him up to speed before I get there.  I wish she’d reconsider.

Please, please, please let this work out.

Let me be on the road to treatment that can help me get closer to the me I hope for.

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